Hello, sugars. I go by Amber and the first thing you need to know about me is that I’m a trans sugar baby.
But being a sugar baby has been amazing. Amazingly enlightening. Let me explain….
I entered this unknown world of sugar babies and sugar daddies, with my expectations low. Like I said, I am transgender, male to female. A huge part of identifying as such is a lack of confidence and comfort in one’s looks.
Before looking into becoming a sugar baby, I went on semi frequent dates, with both men and women, in a search for validation. I had recently started HRT (hormone replacement therapy) and finally felt comfortable enough to present full time as the woman that I always felt was inside of me.
Why did you become a sugar baby?
About a month into my newly found dating life I decided to quit my job. I should say that I regret being so impulsive, but I don’t. I worked as a nurse at a hospital. I had this job before presenting as female, and after, which, to say the least, was awkward.
Even if it wasn’t true, I believed that my coworkers were talking bad about me whenever I wasn’t around. And I completely understood why they would.
Like it or not, I made a decision, for my life, that was and still is outside of the norm. And I’d be foolish not to assume that my abnormal choice would cause some confusion.
So I quit. Now, here I was with bills piling up and no idea how I was going to earn the money for the bills.
A close friend of mine, trans like me, knew my situation and suggested I try what she had been doing to earn money, escorting. The idea gave me a sinking feeling. “Is this what my life has come to? Selling my body for sex?” I asked with my darting eyes, not actually speaking. “I’ll think about it“, I lied.
Although my friend made great money, more than 4k most months, I couldn’t bring myself to be with random men of which I had no interest in, other than for their money.
I decided to do some research and came across a term I’d used jokingly in the past about my mom’s older friends that used to hit on me. Sugar daddy/momma, and sugar babies.
Where and how did you meet your sugar daddy?
The first website that I happened to find in my search was Seeking.com. I decided to create a profile and give it a try. I was viewed by a number of guys and favorited by a few. But nothing really came of those first few introductions.
What do you wish you knew at first?
Here’s a word of caution. If you meet someone who seems too good to be true, they probably are. About a week after creating my profile I received a message from a guy, we’ll call him “Random Rocco.”
Random Rocco offered to pay me 3k a month to just talk to him on the phone, send pics, sexting and stuff like that. He said that he was separated from his wife and living in London, I believe.
Here is the first red flag. Random Ricco needed my bank account information so that he could deposit my allowance directly into my account. This sounded weird to me, obviously. His reasoning was that it was just easier. He even seemed a little irritated that I would be suspicious of his offer.
I decided to think on it and I told him this, which he bitterly accepted. Random Ricco has now shown me a second red flag. What kind of person gets mad because you won’t let them put money in your account? Over the next few days I kept a decent amount of distance from Ricco, but also text him just to keep myself on his mind.
Our texts went as follows:
Me: Hey handsome. ️
RR: hey.
Me: what are you up to?
RR: Just getting off work. Are you ready to give me your bank info so we can begin our arrangement?
At this point my mind has been blanketed by red flags. I decided that as tempting as the money sounded, I couldn’t allow myself to be gullible enough to give a stranger the codes to my financial universe. I did what is so appropriately called “ghosting”. Random Ricco would never receive a reply from me.
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