Sugar daddy red flags span the range. Some are mild, amber warning signs that can mean that a particular sugar daddy is simply inconsiderate. Others are bright red flags that guarantee the man is a fake sugar daddy.
And then there are the glaring, crimson flags that you really need to watch out for. Because those sugar daddy red flags are surefire signs of a sugar daddy scam.
No matter what the red flag is, we can promise you one thing: If you’re a sugar baby, you need to know about them.
Because learning how to quickly spot sugar daddy red flags can be the very thing that keeps you safe during your journey into the sugar world.
That’s why this list exists. We’re going to go in-depth because it’s easy to recognize red flags when they’re happening to someone else.
But when you’re desperate for money and you’re being promised the solution to all your financial problems, it can be tempting to ignore even the brightest red flags.
So which sugar daddy red flags should you be alert for? Here’s the list.
#1. He Asks You for Personal Security Info
Sugar daddies can ask a lot of personal questions. Why’d you decide to be a sugar baby? Have you ever been with another woman? Where was the best place you’ve traveled to? What’s the wildest thing you’ve done in bed?
Some questions may feel very personal. But one thing that a legit sugar daddy will never ask you for is personal security info.
That includes things like:
- Your social security number
- Driver’s license number
- Your bank or credit card login
So if a potential sugar daddy you’ve been talking to asks for the login information to your bank or credit cards, that is just not kosher.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: This isn’t just a red flag. It’s a very common sugar daddy scam. In fact, if anyone who asks you for personal security info, you can rest assured that it is 100% a scam.
#2. Sugar Baby Allowance at the End
You’ve met a sugar daddy. He agrees to an allowance – the amount you want! You’re elated. It’s finally happening.
But wait – he wants to pay your allowance at the end of the month. He’s been burned before, he claims, by a sugar baby who ran off with the allowance as soon as she received it.
It doesn’t matter how believable his reasons are. Approach with caution.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: A sugar daddy who suggests that you enter into a full-blown sugar relationship and that he’ll pay your allowance at the end of the month is basically asking to test drive you.
Chances are, he’ll use that month to get his benefits and then he’ll be gone.
Do not agree to this. Instead, opt for the pay-per-meet option until you develop more trust in the relationship. If he doesn’t agree to that, then you know what his true intentions were.
#3. He Wants to Take You Off the Market
Of course, this isn’t always a red flag. When you find a sugar daddy that you like and begin an arrangement, he’ll probably ask you to take your profile off any sugar daddy websites.
But if you’ve been chatting with a potential sugar daddy for all of 20 minutes and he wants you to delete your profile? Well, that’s a red flag.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: He says he’s sure about you. Your sugar daddy search ends with him. And yet you two have never met. You barely even know each other!
The reason he wants you to delete your profile is so that it’s more difficult for you to report him once he’s tried to scam you on ‘unpoliced’ platforms like WhatsApp or Hangouts.
#4. What?! You Want Money?!
You’ve met a potential sugar daddy on a sugar daddy website. You know what’s up. He knows what’s up. And yet, he wants to talk about anything but the actual arrangement.
When the conversation of money comes up, he waives it away. Maybe he even gets angry about how you’re just using him. Or he guilt trips you for only being interested in the money. He claims he doesn’t want the relationship to feel so “transactional.”
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: Because he’s a salt daddy who has no intention of ever giving you any sugar.
These men go on sugar daddy websites hoping to get some “benefits” out of you before you realize that they’re not going to give you anything in return. They have no intention of fulfilling their end of a mutually beneficial relationship.
We recommend you cut them out quickly and don’t even engage. These types tend to get very defensive and angry when called out.
#5. He Gives You Too Much “Proof”
Sugar daddies are meant to be rich, successful, living the good life. So you don’t think too much of it when a potential sugar daddy sends you a picture of his yacht.
But then, he sends you a picture of a load of cash. Okay.
Then comes some screenshots of his bank account balance(s). Maybe even some screenshots of large sums of money sent to his previous sugar babies.
That’s when you need to cut this guy loose.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: Sugar daddies are generally well off. They may enjoy taking pictures of their luxury cars and hobbies. But no legitimate sugar daddy is going to feel the need to ‘prove’ himself like that to you.
If he does, it’s because he’s trying to portray himself as a very rich man so that you’ll be more likely to trust him when he tries to scam you.
#6. It’s Sexual From the Start
One of the biggest sugar daddy red flags is when a potential sugar daddy tries to get too sexual, too fast.
You ask what he’s looking for and he replies something about “kinky, nsa fun.” He immediately starts asking what you like in bed. He wants to jump on the phone and immediately starts talking dirty. He asks to meet quickly – maybe even tonight! – and he’ll get a hotel room. You know, just in case. Winky emoji.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: A sugar relationship is still a relationship. If a potential sugar daddy shows no interest in getting to know you beyond the sexual, that’s because that’s the only thing he’s interested in. Not an arrangement. Not mutual benefits. He just wants to benefit himself.
You’re not a free phone sex operator. You’re not an unpaid traveling escort. So do yourself a favor and stop talking to men like this. In our experience, they rarely keep their side of the deal. And even if they do, it’s rarely worth it.
#7. You Need to Pay
One of the most glaring sugar daddy red flags is if you are asked to pay. It’s usually presented as a situation where you have to pay something in order to receive what you’re promised.
This applies to all of these scenarios:
- He sent you a large allowance via PayPal. But you need to pay a small fee to get it.
- You’ll be sent a hefty sum to a prepaid card. But you first need to buy and load it yourself.
- You need to buy a gift card worth $xxx to get your allowance.
And any variation that requires you to first spend in order to receive anything.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: This isn’t just a sugar daddy red flag. It’s a popular sugar daddy scam.
There’s a reason a sugar daddy is called a sugar daddy – they provide the sugar. A genuine sugar daddy will never ask you to buy anything yourself. Not a gift card. Or a prepaid credit card. Nada.
In fact, legit sugar daddies will pay the way for pretty much everything. The only thing a legit sugar daddy may have you cover is the Uber fare you take over for your first date. And even that – most genuine sugar daddies will cover it.
#8. His Wording is Strange
Of course, not every genuine sugar daddy is going to be a wordsmith. But if there is something strange about a potential sugar daddy’s wording, it should raise a red flag.
We’re not just talking about typos and grammatical errors, we mean overall syntax. Does he misuse pronouns? Strange formatting? Random capitalization? Odd phrases?
Here are a few examples of scammy sugar daddy message that show what we mean:
“Hello, pretty, nice to meet you. I your profile pictures especially i’ll be happy if you text me back. I’d love to be your sugar Daddy, while you be my sugar baby, my sugar girl and I’ll be here to take care of you and get you paid weekly. My payment start from $5000 if you’re interested.”
“Hello beautiful can you be my sugar baby I’m ready to help you and you gonna get paid weekly let me know whenyy you’re ready I’m not interested in any nudes just chat with me everyday and you gonna get paid for that kindly text…”
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: Everybody can make the odd typo or confuse a homonym or two, but if the overall wording is strange, that’s probably because the potential sugar daddy is not who he claims to be and is not from where he says he is.
#9. It sounds too good to be true
Some sugar daddies are truly generous. They won’t be stingy when offering you an allowance that fits what you’re worth (a lot). However, there’s no such thing as free handouts.
Sugar daddies are smart, successful men. They did not get to where they are by giving something for nothing. So if your potential sugar daddy is offering a hefty monthly allowance in exchange for, well, nothing, there’s a chance that he isn’t the CEO that he says he is, and is planning to scam you.
This is especially true if you two have never met. There are tons of sugar babies out there, so why would he open his wallet to a stranger if he can do the same to someone he’s actually met a few times? Be on your toes, and trust your gut instinct.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: Just ask yourself – why would a good-looking, successful, wealthy man give money to a totally random stranger he has no connection with and never meets or gains any value from? You’re right. He wouldn’t.
#10. This Needs to Happen! Right NOW!
There’s being eager. And then there’s being pushy. A potential sugar daddy may know exactly what he’s looking for and when he finds it – you! – he may be excited to get to know you and work out an arrangement.
It’s also the case that some sugar daddies have very busy work schedules. So if he’s only in your area for a limited amount of time, he may be assertive in pushing for a quick meet up.
That’s all fine. As long as he isn’t trying to force you into compliance.
But if a potential sugar daddy starts pressuring you to do things you’re not comfortable with, be wary. Especially if he creates a sense of urgency:
- “If it doesn’t happen now, I won’t be here”
- “There are other sugar babies who can meet me immediately”
- “This needs to be done now or you won’t get anything”
If he’s dangling benefits as a limited time offer and trying to pressure you into doing something without giving you the time to fully think it through, the chances are that he’s up to no good.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: Giving you a false sense of urgency is a tactic so that you won’t have time to thoroughly think through what is in your best interest. This pressure also prevents you from seeking rational advice from someone you trust or even doing proper research. This is why it’s a common trick used in scams.
In the worst case scenario, a sugar daddy who pressures you is trying to put you in a frantic mental state so that it’s easier to scam you. In the best case scenario, he’s an inconsiderate person who doesn’t care about your comfort.
Either way, he doesn’t deserve your time.
#11. He Wants to Meet You Somewhere Private
A sugar daddy wants to finally meet you. He’s talking the talk and making lots of promises. You’re excited for this first sugar date…until he asks you to come to his hotel room. Or to his beach house. Or anywhere that is a private, isolated location.
It doesn’t matter how valid his reasons are. Perhaps he’s married and doesn’t want to risk discovery. Maybe he’s an important public figure and needs to keep things as discreet as possible. Or maybe he just appreciates good old-fashioned privacy.
Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. Your need for safety trumps his need for an intimate first meeting.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: It’s always risky to meet a complete stranger in a private location. That’s why it’s one of the most important rules of sugar baby safety. You already know the worst that can happen. It’s not worth the risk to you.
#12. He asks you for nudes before meeting
A respectful sugar daddy should never ask you for nudes. Especially before you are in an arrangement. Genuine sugar daddies are kind and courteous, and they never pressure a sugar baby to do something they’re uncomfortable with. If he asks for nudes or other provocative pictures, that’s a big no-no.
If you both have an established relationship and he’s proved to be real sugar, and you’re comfortable, go for it! If not, block him and don’t look back. These “sugar daddies” are just fishing for nudes and won’t actually reward you for them.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: At worst, it could be a scam. There is the risk that he could use the nudes to blackmail you or even sell the images online. But even if it’s not a scam – for example, a fake sugar daddy just wants to use your nudes without providing anything in return, it’s still not worth the risk.
Whether it’s a scam or just a fake sugar daddy, there’s no upside for you either way.
#13. He Doesn’t Want to Wear a Condom
Most sugar relationships have a sexual component, which is why it’s important to protect yourself sexually just as much as you would physically, emotionally, and financially.
And this is why it’s one of the biggest sugar daddy red flags when a potential sugar daddy claims to “not like using condoms.”
Unless you’re in a relationship with your sugar daddy that’s:
- Sexually exclusive
- Trusting and respectful
- Got one or both of you on birth control, i.e. vasectomy, IUD, etc.
If you don’t met the above criteria, a sugar daddy should absolutely be willing to wear a condom.
Why It’s a Sugar Daddy Red Flag: You don’t need us to tell you the risks that come with unprotected sex. STDs. Pregnancy.
Both you and your sugar daddy should care enough about each other to make sure these risks don’t come to fruition. A sugar daddy who doesn’t care is not a sugar daddy that’s worth the risk.
Updated on March 12, 2023