Hey, my name is Azania. I am a 20 year old sugar baby in South Africa.
Until I was 19, I resided in a small town called The Vaal. I moved to the big city (Johannesburg) for university purposes where I lived with a roommate for a year. Recently, I moved to my own place.
I am a full-time student and come from a relatively well-off family. However, I dislike being fully dependent on my parents. Finding work as a full-time student is the equivalent of searching for a needle in a haystack. Thus I started looking into the world of sugaring.
Why did you become a sugar baby?
Coming into varsity, I had only been with one guy (my current boyfriend of 2 years) and having conversations with my new friends about sex made me curious.
I started having thoughts such as “what if I’m experiencing mediocre sex and I just don’t know it because I have nothing to compare it to.” I spoke to my boyfriend about my curiosities and the possibility of being in an open relationship. He laughed it off and I never mentioned it again.
It was in my second year when I decided that I wanted to explore having sex with other people. It was around the same time that I realized that living alone definitely required more money or a change in my lifestyle.
I decided to kill two birds with one stone. That’s when sugaring came into the picture. Sugaring would allow me to experience sex with a different man whilst making money.
What do you wish you knew before starting?
My first ever sugar dating experience was not too hectic. The only thing I wish I had known is that it’s 100% okay to negotiate your payment. Also, that it is 100% okay to tell your sugar daddy when a location he has chosen to meet does not please you.
I wish I knew that it’s better to fully sort out the terms of your agreement before you meet as it makes the encounter less awkward and less transactional.
Also, being plus sized had me thinking that the whole sugaring world would be harder to navigate for me. However I found that being plus sized – specifically being a plus sized model – somehow came with its advantages.
I’m tall and curvy so naturally I command attention wherever I go. But when it comes to the sugaring world, I turn heads.
Most sugar daddies in South Africa are Nigerian. And Nigerian men love their woman tall and voluptuous so as a sugar baby in South Africa, that was a big plus for me.
Complexion is definitely something sugar daddies in my country pay attention to. The majority are looking for light skinned women so being a light-skinned black girl definitely worked in my favor.
How does a sugar baby in South Africa find a sugar daddy?
Actually, I met my sugar daddy at a mall. So I don’t have much experience with sugar dating online. I was casually strolling and I noticed him noticing me as he walked out of a store. I was walking towards an exit and I made it out before he could decide to talk to me.
A minute or 2 later I realized I had forgotten to buy something at a certain store. So I walked back into the mall. As I was about to exit the store, he walked in and gazed right into my eyes.
He greeted me and introduced himself using the title Dr. He told me he would really like to get to know me and asked for my number.
I thought he was being smug by introducing himself as Dr instead of just using his first name. But I also took it as a hint that maybe he’s wealthy. I was in a rush so I gave him my number and immediately walked out.
What was your first sugar date like?
A day later he texted me asking if we can hang out at his place. I suggested that we rather go out for lunch and he agreed but added that we’ll retire to a hotel.
I told him there’ll be no need to book a hotel as my intentions were just to get to know him. I had to return home to the Vaal on the day he wanted to meet so I had to cancel.
He let me know that he’d be flying to the UK in two days and that he would really love to see me before he left. He said he’d pay my way to travel back to him in Johannesburg and that he’d pay me R1000 if I slept with him.
At the time I really needed the money so I decided to cut my visit home short to go see him. He sent me an address which led to an argument as we had discussed that we would be meeting at his place however he had booked a hotel.
As a first time sugar baby, I was very skeptical of having to be seen in public with an older man. Not to mention having to face the receptionist who would definitely be able to make out that I’m a sugar baby.
I told him that if he wants me to come to a hotel he would have to increase the money he was going to give me. My encounter with him was easy. He was caring and concerned, a complete gentleman.
What’s your favorite thing about being a sugar baby?
Apart from the money of course, one of my favorite things about being a sugar baby is that you actually learn so much.
Sugar daddies are older and they’ve been through their fair share of life. So as an aspiring sugar baby, don’t be afraid to ask questions and have normal conversations with your sugar daddy. You could really be surprised by how much knowledge you can gain out of it.
It will also score you a few extra points with your sugar daddy. Most sugar daddies enjoy feeling like you’re gaining more from them than just luxuries. More often than not, they enjoy perceiving sugaring as more of an investment.
How do you keep a sugar relationship interesting?
When it comes to keeping things interesting, it’s key to remember never to get too comfortable. Keep yourself looking as good as you did when he first met you. Continue as if you’re constantly working to impress.
The main reason sugar daddies go for younger women is because younger women are more spontaneous, attractive and youthful. So keep your energy as vibrant as possible and stay far away from anything that could bring drama and baggage in the arrangement.
Remember that’s part of what sugar daddies want to avoid by going for younger women.
What advice do you have for new sugar babies?
LISTEN!!! I can’t stress it enough exactly how important it is to be a good listener. Sugar daddies genuinely love having a non-judgmental ear around and they appreciate having sugar babies who are good conversationalists.