You might’ve already read my sugar baby story, but in case you haven’t, my name is Lindsey and I got my start on SeekingArrangement, aka SA. There are a lot of good sugar dating sites, but I’ve stayed with SA because it is simple, easy to use, and usually shows more information on its users.
Since I’ve had a good run with this site, I wanted to share some of my own insights and tips on how to find a sugar daddy on Seeking Arrangement. Hopefully it’ll help new sugar babies navigate the site better and maybe even help out the more experienced sugar babies.
Okay, without further ado, here are some tips on how to get started successfully on SA!
Read the book
Not a lot of people know this, but Brandon Wade, the founder of Seeking Arrangement actually wrote a book on it. It’s called Seeking Arrangement: The Definitive Guide to Sugar Daddy and Mutually Beneficial Relationships.
It gives good background information on the site, and will give you insight into what a SD is looking for.
Unfortunately you can’t get it online yet, just paperback (you can find a sugar daddy online, but not a book? what?!). But if you don’t want to buy the book, there are many Youtube videos from sugar babies, news outlets, and SA. I’ve posted a few below.
Don’t worry about the money just yet
When you are first getting started on the site, try to keep your mind off of money. It will pay off in the long run!
Try to meet up with different types of people to see what you like in a SD and what different people have to offer. For your first few sugar dating experiences, you will want to focus on finding nice, generous, and understanding SDs who can show you what a healthy sugar relationship is like.
The money side of things is confusing to figure out at first anyways, so it is better to get some experience before stressing about it.
Do not put “negotiable” as your lifestyle
It is much easier to focus on the other aspects of sugar dating and learn what it is all about if you specify a Lifestyle budget: I suggest starting out with Practical.
That way, the expectation is already set, and you won’t end up accidentally dating a “salt daddy” (which will inevitably happen once or twice anyways).
If you start out with negotiable, you will have to put a lot more work into figuring out finances with potential sugar daddies (POTs). To avoid any confusion and figure out the monetary side of things early on, it is better to have something specific in the Lifestyle category and negotiate a different amount later on if necessary.
If you do need to negotiate allowance, don’t bring it up too quickly, but make it clear what you are expecting. Don’t spit out a number: ask them to tell you how much they usually give. When given a number, I usually ask for slightly more than what I am expecting.
Check out more articles on sugar baby allowance:
- What is a reasonable sugar baby allowance to ask for?
- 10 allowance tips every sugar baby should know
- 5 popular ways to receive your allowance
Find ways that you are different and play them up!
Now that you have some background on what a “typical” SB might act like and how a sugar relationship might look like, think about how you are different from that mold or how you want your relationship to differ.
When I was thinking about becoming a SB, I saw that most SBs wear a lot of makeup, and I hate makeup.
Instead of sucking it up and wearing makeup anyways to fit the SB mold, I made sure I wasn’t wearing makeup in any of my SA pictures. Now POTs expect the girl-next-door look instead of arm candy.
Create your unique SB persona!
When you are first getting started, it’s a good idea to use a fake name and job. This can be a fun way to create an “alter ego.” It’s very easy for wealthy, successful men to figure out more about you if they have even seemingly harmless information.
Once, a SD found my real name and FB page because I told him what high school I had gone to and what sport I had played. It is best to keep these details vague at first. You can tell them more about yourself after you have an established relationship.
Start off with Premium and Diamond Club members
Premium and Diamond members pay more to use the site, so they are usually more serious and experienced with sugar dating, and can teach you more about the sugar lifestyle. They also get their income and background verified, so you are less likely to wind up on a date with a “salt daddy.”
Proceed with caution at first
I’ve never had trouble on SA, but you should be careful with any type of online dating. Don’t believe everything an SD says at first: trust should be built, not assumed. Be open and accepting, but wary. Wait a few months for travel.
Use fake personal information initially. Use protection no matter what, unless you know that your SD is monogamous and he has shown you an STD test. Many SDs are having sex with many people at the same time, and you never know.
Above all, enjoy your time with your SD. It isn’t worth the money if you aren’t comfortable in the relationship, and there are plenty of fish in the sea. Have fun trying out the world of sugar dating!
Seeking Arrangements is one of the most popular sugar dating websites but it’s certainly not the only one. Check out our reviews for the best sugar daddy websites!
How and when do you ask a sugar daddy to provide an STD test? That seems like it would be a difficult question to ask.