If you want to know how to hide being a sugar baby, I totally get you. I prefer to live my life as a secret sugar baby as well. It’s a common sentiment in the sugar world.
In fact, for many sugar babies, the very thought of telling friends and family about your sugar baby double life will make your skin crawl. After all, why on earth would you want your friends and family to know you have a sugar daddy?! And to deal with the questions, criticism and the condemnation that follows…no, thank you.
But then, again, because I am a full-time sugar baby, I often get a routine set of questions that are constantly directed to my attention.
The dreaded conversation of “Where did you get that purse?” or better yet, “How did you afford that purse?” Generally, the sugar provided by sugar daddies isn’t sugar that you could normally afford on your own!
Slips will happen when you bring up that time you went to this nice restaurant or you did something fun with “Ted” and your friends will ask you “who’s Ted?” Oops.
And that’s why you need to know how to hide being a sugar baby – and do it flawlessly.
Why Be a Secret Sugar Baby?
Personally, I like to keep my sugar lifestyle a secret. Not even my best, best, best, BEST friend knows. I feel like they’ll slightly judge me but they’ll understand and support what I’m doing as long as I’m safe.
But I still choose to keep it a secret from them. Why? My friends have brought up the idea of sugar dating and how they know friends that do it. It’s almost always followed by a harsh remark. Or I see them make jokes about wanting a sugar daddy and it just turns me off telling them.
I believe that this is my personal life and what I do is what I do, so I chose not to share it and there is nothing wrong with that.
Despite our culture’s emphasis on telling the truth and not lying and all that jazz, keeping your sugar lifestyle to yourself is not shameful. A sugar relationship is a relationship much like anything else but much of the general public still regards it suspiciously.
So keeping your sugar baby lifestyle under wraps is actually a smart way to protect yourself from unwanted and tiring criticism. It’s also a wise way to protect your future self from unwanted scrutiny and judgment.
Sugar relationships are still so misunderstood by the world at large and I don’t want to cost myself opportunities because of people’s biases.
The downside to being a secret sugar baby, of course, is that it requires a little more behind the scenes work. You’ll have to come up with explanations as to how you’re suddenly awash with cash, jet setting off on exotic adventures and have all the latest Apple gear.
But hey, you’re definitely smart enough to come up with ways to keep it all under wraps – here’s a few suggestions how!
How to Hide Being a Sugar Baby
If you, like me, decide to keep mum about your double life as a sugar baby, it’s not so much lying as it is simply never mentioning it. And of course, that requires quite a bit of creativity.
Not to mention, planning.
But you got this. Here are the best things to do.
Get your own place
I can thankfully say I live alone and in another city from my parents so I don’t have to try as hard to hide my “double life” from them. But I can see how tough this would be if your situation was that you lived at home.
Most parents don’t want their daughter depending on this lifestyle so you’ll have to be extra cautious on hiding any fancy things your sugar daddy buys for you, why you’ve been going out so dressed up lately or why you sporadically have to leave the house. It’s a very risky thing to hide from your parents, especially if they’re the helicopter parent type.
That’s why I recommend that if you want to keep your sugar life a secret, having your own place is the only way to guarantee absolute privacy. It just makes everything so much easier since you don’t have to explain all your comings and goings to friends or family.
When my friends ask to hang out or they ask what I did, where I was this weekend, I can choose to say “I didn’t do much, just stayed at home.” You can say that you binge-watched a Netflix series you already watched or even worked on a puzzle.
Whatever it is, your home is your private castle so that gives you an easy excuse as to why you are so often busy.
Plus, it’s a place to stash a lot of the stuff your sugar daddy gives you…
Get It In Cash
If you were working at Starbucks one week and then strutting around in Louboutins the next, you’re going to raise suspicions. As tempting as it is to flaunt the gifts your sugar daddy gives you, if you want to hide being a sugar baby – you need to hide the evidence!
And the easiest way to do that is to get your sugar wealth in the form of cold hard cash. There’s good reason why cash is still one of the most popular ways for sugar babies to get paid.
The most discreet way to handle your sugar wealth is to hold it in cash in your bank account. And then – don’t talk about it. Just live your normal life (but better).
Instead of flaunting your new sugar allowance, keep living the life you used to – minus the stress of having to pay your bills and plus the joy of getting to splurge on little extras. No one has to be any wiser about the extras.
Hide Your Online Sugar Baby Identity
Most of us find our sugar daddies through the most popular sugar daddy websites. And whereas these websites are secure and only viewable to other members, you do run the risk of your real identity being found out if someone wanted to do a little Google digging, especially with reverse image search.
Nobody needs that. Especially if you want to be a secret sugar baby. Here’s how to hide being a sugar baby online:
- Have a Sugar Baby Online Identity. This means that you should create new accounts for everything related to your sugar baby life. It’s not just necessary for secrecy’s sake, but for your safety as well. Register for sugar daddy websites using an email address that you use just for sugaring. Don’t use your real phone number – get a Google Voice account. You can even set up a separate PayPal account with your sugar baby email address.
- Reverse Image Search Your Own Photos. Before adding sugar baby profile pictures, do an image search for it to see what comes up. There’s a good chance that it automatically links you to your social media accounts. That’s why the best practice is to use new photos for your sugar baby profile. If you can’t take all new pictures, then change the picture you plan on using – resize, crop, add filters, even add a border or designs like hearts and flowers. Re-check with image search when you’re done.
- No Personal Information. When you sign up with a sugar daddy website or app, choose a fresh username that’s completely different from your social media usernames. And, of course, any and all personal information stays off your sugar baby profile – i.e. your full name, where you go to school, where you work, and basically any information that can be used to easily identify you.
Devise a Cover Story
This one is the best way to cover your butt and make being a secret sugar baby much easier. One of the easiest cover stories I use is freelancing. It’s pretty standard now and everyone knows someone who’s doing it. Just craft a story around certain client(s) you’re working with and use that to explain away the time you’re unavailable and the extra funds you’re acquiring.
Another convenient cover story is to say you’ve started actively online dating. And then you can disguise every sugar daddy date as a first date from Hinge or Tinder.
No need to get into specifics – I can say I went on a date with someone and we went to a coffee shop and a nice walk. I don’t have to disclose who it is and I can just play it off that I just met this guy on some dating app and that it’s nothing serious right now. “We’re just seeing each other” is usually enough.
Maybe giving a pseudonym to your sugar daddy will be fun for you! Just don’t let it get to a serious point where your friends want to meet this so-called guy you’re seeing.
Make Use of Your “Network”
I occasionally travel with my sugar daddy as well. If you do as well, you can either choose to show it on social media or don’t show it.
Because if you do, it can raise suspicious from your friends and family because you were just talking about how you can’t afford to go out a while ago and now you’re getting on a plane to go somewhere?
This is where it helps to have a “network.” Because pulling the friend, school and/or work card is often the easiest. If you developed a cover story that you’ve started freelancing, you can say that you got a large project. If you have a part-time job, you can make use of your co-workers. The story that I stuck with was saying that I have a friend that worked higher up in a travel business. She could bring along one friend for a cheap price, so how could I say no.
I’m sure this excuse gets a little transparent after a while but it sure did work for me.
So say you’re out with friends, maybe name the friend your parents love the most. School could be very busy this semester and you have a study group along with many group projects. Work could get busy too, a co-worker could be on a medical or pregnancy leave and you’re covering her shifts.
This post is brought to you by one of our contributing SB writers, Noelle, aka The Different One. You can check out her sugar baby story here!