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How to Talk to a Sugar Daddy to Build Attraction and Connection

The question of how to talk to a sugar daddy is one that comes up again and again. And it’s no surprise why.

One of the hardest parts of dating in general is the introductory conversation. What do you say to a sugar daddy? How do you write sugar daddy greetings that get responded to? How do you show him you’re interested without coming off desperate?

We’ve all stared at many a blank message box, wondering how best to communicate interest in a potential sugar daddy without sounding bland or fake.

If you’re here wondering how to talk to a sugar daddy, we got you. After hundreds of messages and conversations with potentials, actual sugar daddies, and just sugar friends, we have several tips on the art of sugar daddy conversation.

Here’s what we’ll cover:

  • Our best pro tips on how to talk to a sugar daddy
  • How to talk to a sugar daddy on the phone
  • A list of sugar daddy conversation starters to build connection
  • Questions to ask a sugar daddy to see if you have a future together

Let’s get to it.

How to Talk to Sugar Daddies on the Phone

So you’ve sent several messages to potential sugar daddies and gotten replies.

Read: How to Message a Sugar Daddy to Grab His Attention

Once you’ve reeled in a potential sugar daddy, the last thing you want to do is to keep exchanging messages. You want to move the exchange to real-time conversation as soon as you can.

The best way to do this? Jump on a phone call with the potential sugar daddy.

If you aren’t in the practice of hopping on a call with potential sugar daddies, we highly recommend you start. Because being a good phone conversationalist puts you way ahead of the game.

Here’s why: Our generation may do most of our communication via texting but when it comes to sugar daddies, things are a little different. Sugar daddies, in general, are pretty comfortable on the phone.

Phone calls with sugar daddies are also a great idea because these little phone chats can become an invaluable tool in the sugar baby’s seduction tool belt.

Here’s how a strong phone game puts you heads and shoulders ahead of your competition…

You become a real person

That simple first phone call with sugar daddy may not seem like much but it makes him think of you as a “real” person.

Sugar daddy sites are teeming with hot, young, clever sugar babies fighting for a sugar daddy’s attention.

But if he hasn’t had an actual conversation with any of them, they don’t seem very “real” to him, they are just mere profiles. But by hearing your voice, your unique laugh, you’re instantly separated from the masses in his mind.

A good phone chat builds rapport

Before you even meet, you get this opportunity to gently tease him, laugh at his jokes, learn little tidbits about him and get him curious about you.

This little bit of rapport building goes a long way toward ensuring your first date feels comfortable, like you’ve already known each other for awhile.

It allows you to screen him

The downside of meeting people online is that there are some weirdos out there – trust us, we’ve talked to a lot of them. These are the sort of folk who try to get you to have phone sex with them within the first phone call.

Guess what? That short phone call lets you save the few hours you might’ve wasted actually going on a date with one of these weirdos.

As you can see, a sugar daddy phone call is a lot more than a simple exchange of info and logistics. It’s an opportunity to come across as the sugar baby of his dreams before you even meet. As such, it’s the most important pre-game you have access to.

Editor’s note: I can attribute at least two arrangements I’ve had to really good phone conversations. During pre-date conversations, we established enough of a connection that the date was mostly just a verification to see if I looked like my pictures. In both cases, I had an arrangement offer by the end of that first date.

Neither arrangement would’ve happened without the phone conversations that had preceded the date.

In case you’re wondering what was said or done during these phone chats to get results, there are a few conversation tricks that will really help you when talking to potential sugar daddies on the phone.

The best news? If you make use of these tricks, they won’t just help you land sugar daddies – they’ll help you in any conversation. So, here goes…

How to Talk to a Sugar Daddy: Pro Tips

You already know the bare basics of how to talk to a sugar daddy – be friendly and polite like you would be when talking to anybody. But there are some pro tips that we’ve gleaned over the years that will take your sugar daddy conversation to the next level.

Here’s what to do.

Skip the Small Talk

The last thing you want to do is start a sugar daddy conversation off in an awkward, getting-to-know-you ice breaker at a community meeting sort of tone.

So start every conversation from the middle. This means skipping the small talk. Small talk is silly and even worse – it’s unmemorable. Instead, dive straight into the conversation as if you are already friends who know and like each other.

Here’s an example: One potential sugar daddy I was messaging had a picture of him and his friends around a bonfire that looked a little macabre so I had joked in our messages about him holding a seance.

When we finally spoke on the phone, I picked up with a big smile and a “Hey, so happy you finally called! No seance for you tonight?” Which led to a round of questions about which people who are dead we’d like to talk to and what questions we’d ask.

A bit dark, yes, but it was a fun, effortless conversation and at the end of it, we both felt like we knew a lot about each other.

Exude Positivity

This sounds so stupid simple but it’s the key to setting the stage for an awesome conversation. Because people will forget what you said and what they said but they won’t forget how you made them feel.

And energy – or vibes, whatever you want to call them – has a way of transmitting itself even over the Internet or phone lines.

So as silly as it sounds, put a smile on your face next time you pick up a phone call from a potential sugar daddy. They’ll know you’re smiling and happy to talk to them even without being able to see you.

Even better – don’t be stingy with your laughter. This doesn’t mean you have to fake it, but assume a general attitude of happiness and let yourself laugh when he makes the effort.

A good tip is to try picking up the phone mid-laugh, as if you were right in the middle of having a really good time. I don’t know why but this nips any discomfort or awkwardness and sets an easy-going, joking tone that lasts throughout the conversation.

And of course, it goes without saying: don’t whine, moan or complain. Save that for your therapist.

Drop a Compliment

Women are notorious for loving compliments and most of us are fed a steady diet of them. But do you know who doesn’t get compliments? Men.

In fact, I’ve known guys – really cute guys – who claim that nobody has ever really complimented them on their looks. Good god, can you imagine going through life without anyone showing appreciation for the way you are?

It’s very likely the potential sugar daddy you’re talking to hasn’t heard a compliment for weeks or months. So pay him a genuine compliment.

Just don’t make it awkward ’cause then you’ll have this conversation:

You: “You’re handsome.”

Him: “Thank you, you’re gorgeous yourself.”

You: “Thanks.”

*Awkward silence*

If you’re going to compliment him, make it lighthearted. Here’s an example: “Oh, perfect, you’ve got a great voice, I was curious about that – it’s a key point of attraction for me, you know. You have one of those radio voices. Do you sing?”

That last question after a compliment allows you to naturally segue into more personal conversations about hobbies, past and present interests, and so on. Make use of it.

The best thing about the above sugar daddy conversation tips are that they can form the basis of any flirtatious, friendly conversation. So the more you practice, the better you get at conversation with anyone – including any and all future sugar daddies.

How to Start a Conversation with a Sugar Daddy

Whether it’s in a message, a phone call, or during a meet & greet, you need to know how to start a conversation with a sugar daddy. Because this initial conversation matters.

The very first conversation with a sugar daddy can be a make-it-or-break-it event. If it goes swimmingly well, he’ll be eager to talk to you again and even more enthusiastic about having that first meet & greet.

On the other hand, if the first sugar daddy conversation is dull, unmemorable, or offensive – it’s safe to say that there’s where the relationship ends.

Read: What to Say to a Sugar Daddy And Things You Should Never Say

So the last thing you want to do is spend this precious time making mindless small talk. You want to go straight for the jugular with a conversation that builds rapport and connection and makes him want to see you again.

So how do you do that? Here are some tips.

Be Original. Like we said, there is a lot competition on sugar dating websites and sugar daddies may be inundated with messages from sugar babies, many of which are bland and similar. So you want to differentiate yourself by taking the time to write a personalized message.

Be Interested. Sugar daddies are people too. They have wants, needs, insecurities like the rest of us. And they feel flattered and cared for when someone expresses a genuine interest in getting to know them.

Actively Listen. You can practice this by focusing fully on the sugar daddy when he’s speaking and showing interest in what he’s saying. Ask open-ended questions to encourage him to talk. We also like to use the “Yes, And” tool that’s practiced in improv to acknowledge what the sugar daddy is saying and then build on his point.

Make Sure You Naturally Get On. Unlike what the media portrays, sugar relationships aren’t about just looks, sex, and money. The majority of the time, you’ll be spending time together and talking. So you need to make sure you naturally get on. As much as you want to impress the potential sugar daddy in the first conversation, also assess if he’s impressive to you. Is he interesting enough for you to want to spend time with?

Ask Interesting Questions. Of course, the best way to assess whether the sugar daddy is for you is to ask him the right questions. The best conversations are ones that you both organically vibe to – that happens naturally. But you might want a handy list of conversation starters to get you there.

21 Sugar Daddy Conversation Starters

Sugar daddy conversation starters can range from the mundane – “How’s your day going?” – to the profound – “For what in your life do you feel most grateful?”

The key is to flawlessly transition from the everyday chit chat into the deep and meaningful conversations that make it feel like you are already close friends.

Here are some of the best sugar daddy conversation starters to get you there…

Ask about him

People like it when others show interest and most sugar daddies are more than happy to talk about themselves. You can start by asking:

  • What do you do?
  • How do you spend your free time?
  • What sort of music/movies do you like?
  • Do you play any sports?
  • What’s your favorite book?
  • Have you read a good book lately?

Ask unusual questions about him

These are the kinds of questions that people don’t normally get asked so there is a novelty factor and usually lead to fun discussions. That makes them some of the best conversation topics to have with your sugar daddy. Try:

  • What is your perfect date?
  • Would you like to be famous? For what?
  • What is your perfect day?
  • What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever intentionally eaten?
  • Is there a city or country you’ve visited that you’d never go back to?

Go deeper into personal questions

There are questions that ask the “what” – like what sports do you like. And then there are deeper questions that ask the “why” – like why does that sport matter to you. It’s the second one that personalizes the conversation so follow up with those, like:

  • What’s your favorite thing about *insert hobby*?
  • What’s one movie you can watch again and again? Why?
  • Why did you decide to become *insert profession*?
  • What do you consider to be the greatest accomplishment in your life so far?

Ask about his experience on the website you met on

This is one of the easiest conversation topics to have with your sugar daddy, even if you just met him. It’s a good icebreaker since it’s a shared experience you have in common. Plus, most people have had some strange yet funny encounters. To take this further, be prepared with your silliest, weirdest story from the website but make sure that it doesn’t make you look stuck-up, rude, or judgmental.

You can also transition to ask him:

  • What brings him to the website in the first place – what’s he looking for?
  • Has he ever had a successful arrangement before?

Ask about his relationship goals

Great conversation topics to have with your sugar daddy is to talk about relationships. It is a great way to make conversation while simultaneously finding out about what he’s looking for in a sugar baby. Ask questions like:

  • What qualities do you look for in a woman?
  • What is the most attractive thing about a woman?
  • Is there something you always wished a woman would do for you?
  • What are deal breakers for you? Pet peeves?

Talk about future goals and dreams

Some of the best conversation topics to have with your sugar daddy are ones about the future. They’re perfect because they allow the sugar daddy to imagine a future with you. Plus, it lets you hint about experiences that you desire. Ask questions like:

  • What are the top three places in the world you’d like to visit?
  • Is there anything you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time?
  • Is there something you’ve always wanted to learn but haven’t had the chance?

Fun and silly questions

These aren’t practical conversation topics to have with your sugar daddy but they are light-hearted and allow you both some fun and laughs. They can be great banter over dinner and drinks and even offer the chance to learn about each other more on a deeper level.

  • If you could wake up tomorrow and have any ability or superpower, what would it be?
  • If you could be famous for anything – what would it be?
  • If you could only eat one country’s cuisine for the rest of your life, which country would you choose?

Talk about things that make you happy and things that make you laugh. Just remember that the goal is connection. So ask the questions you would like to be asked as well as what you actually want to get to know about the potential sugar daddy.

The Final Note

Of course, the above sugar daddy conversation topics are only to get your creative juices flowing. There are tons more tips, tricks, ideas and conversations starters out there, here are some of the best we’ve found:

And keep mind that sugar daddy conversation is a skill that you’ll get better at over time. Conversation in any new and foreign terrain can be daunting, but don’t let your learning curve discourage you from trying.

Stay engaged, put in effort, and you’ll reap the benefits. You may not always connect with a potential sugar daddy but that’s practice for the next one.

Nothing is ever really lost with these sugar daddy conversations. Regardless of where it leads, they’re a learning experience that will help you become more comfortable with conversing with people in general.

So there you go – everything you need to know on how to talk to a sugar daddy. Now go forth and impress his socks off.

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