Sugar baby burnout. Sugar baby fatigue. Sugar baby exhaustion. Whatever you choose to call it, one thing is for sure: it happens to the best of us.
It’s not surprising when you think about it. Sure, there are amazing perks to being a sugar baby. But it’s not all sugar and sprinkles. Being a sugar baby is work.
And like all work, it can lead to some serious burnout.
Why Sugar Baby Burnout Happens
For starters, you need to look the part. As much as sugar daddies say that they like the natural look – they haven’t seen you at your realest moments with scruffy sweatpants and your unwashed hair in a sloppy bun.
To look “naturally” gorgeous, there’s a world of beauty routines most of us go through that sugar daddies couldn’t even imagine. Hair care, hair removal, makeup, nails, curating our outfits, moisturizing, and the list goes on.
Then there are all the frogs you have to sit through dates with on your search to find the ideal arrangement. The potential sugar daddies that talk non-stop about their uninteresting careers. The ones that make sexually explicit jokes and comments all night. And the ones that talk down to you the whole night and then become angry when you don’t agree to go to their hotel room.
On top of all that, there is the judgment. It could be the silent but nasty stares from other people who see a young girl with a much older sugar daddy. Or it could just be the awareness that your friends and family wouldn’t approve if they knew what you were doing.
Last but not least, there’s the loneliness. If you don’t have sugar baby friends or a social circle of people who know about your life as a sugar baby, you’ll find yourself living the highest highs and the lowest lows of the sugar baby experience – alone.
With nobody in your life to confide in at these moments, being a sugar baby can feel isolating on top of all the other challenges.
So, if you’re feeling a little exhausted with your life as a sugar baby – we get it. But there are some things you can do to alleviate the exhaustion.
How to Deal with Sugar Baby Burnout
As one sugar baby put it:
“You will burn out. You will burn out. You will burn out. There will come a point in your sugaring life where you will hate what you are doing.”Anita
It’s happened to you. It happens to pretty much all sugar babies. It’s how you deal with it that matters.
I’ve personally found these 7 things to be helpful in balancing life and sugar when you’re dealing with sugar baby burnout.
Cut out the most stressful relationships
Are you talking to a sugar daddy who is a time drain, needs too much attention, or is just plain annoying? Cut him out of your communications and you will have more energy to focus on yourself.
We’ve all had stressful relationships, or sugar daddies who constantly complain or stress out about the hardships/details involved in seeing you.
Sometimes, this can be married men who are balancing you and their families. I had a sugar daddy who wanted me to go on a lot of weekend trips and long date nights with him. But needed to plan these dates weeks in advanced and down to the last detail because of scheduling time with his ex-wife to see his kids.
I enjoyed my time with him. But planning everything and dealing with his stress became too time consuming and emotionally draining.
Plan more relaxing dates
If you like going out to eat or going on walks, plan sugar dates doing those things. This will also help you to be more comfortable on the date and not worry about or show whatever it is that might be going on in your life, if you aren’t ready to share that.
When I am not feeling well, I plan quick coffee dates. These are much easier if I am not feeling well.
Re-visit your old flings
Had a sugar daddy who you got along great with, but maybe you lost touch when a better, more interested potential sugar daddy showed up?
Shoot him a text, and pick up where things left off. It takes way less effort to start back up an old relationship than to find a new one.
Most sugar babies have a string of these types of potential sugar daddies that we mostly forget about, especially if you’re doing the right thing by constantly putting yourself out there.
It can be the sugar daddy who you got along well with but you disregarded because he lived a little too far from you. It can be the sugar daddy you went on a few dates with but who only wanted to give you a shopping allowance.
Either way, the slow periods are a good time to catch up with these forgotten sugar daddies and see if anything has changed.
Keep a flexible schedule
Let your sugar daddy know that you are having a busy/hard month. See if they would be OK setting up a last minute date. That way you can meet when you are are feeling up to it.
Instead of committing to long dinner dates, I would have guys meet me to walk my dog. So I could double the date with something I needed to do anyways. Plus, longer walks for the puppy!
Reset your search filters
If you are feeling down, have less time to spare, or you’re just plain old exhausted, try resetting your search filters to find someone who better matches your new needs.
I find married guys are more relaxed and OK not meeting up all the time. That works better for me when I’m not feeling as well and may not be able to meet/communicate on a scheduled or consistent basis.
Keep up communication with current Sugar Daddies
Even if you can’t see them in person, check in with anyone you are seeing at least weekly. Let them know what is going on and that you are OK. That way, you will easily be able keep seeing them when you are ready. Some sugar daddies may even agree to keep up your allowance.
I tried to text my sugar daddies twice weekly when I was going through burnout. This is hard when that is the last thing on your mind, but one of the sugar daddies I had kept in touch with gave me a little extra money the next time I saw him to help me pay for therapy.
Even if you don’t need their help, sugar daddies appreciate feeling needed. Texting them will make them feel that you need their support.
Put your well-being first
Don’t push it. If you need to cancel a date, be sure to explain why, but don’t try to do too much.
You need to allow yourself to take a break.
I started by cutting my date nights in half. As long as you explain what is going on, most sugar daddies will understand.
If you need a complete break from sugar, that’s okay too. Put the sugar daddy search on hold. Go indulge in the hobbies that recharge you, spend quality time with friends and family.
And most importantly – allow yourself a life beyond being a sugar baby. Sugar is just one part of your life – not the whole you. So focus on the other aspects of your life until you feel better.
This post is brought to you by one of our contributing SB writers, Lindsey, aka Miss Independent. You can check out her sugar baby story here!