If you find yourself wondering: Should I be a sugar baby? It’s time to take a closer look at the pros and cons of being a sugar baby.
The life of a sugar baby is unique and presents both challenges and rewards, both ups and downs. Most aspiring sugar babies dive into the sugar world, noticing only the rewards only to find out they can’t deal with the challenges involved.
If you’re currently considering sugar dating, first read through the list below. We’ve tried to distill years of living the sugar baby life to provide you a glimpse into the actual sugar baby lifestyle. Not what the media presents and often glosses over. But what most of us live on a day-to-day basis.
Check to see if the pros match what you’re looking for and the cons are something you can deal with.
And of course, if you’re a seasoned sugar baby, let us know in the comments of other benefits and drawbacks we may have left out!
6 Perks of Being a Sugar Baby
Let’s start with the perks of being a sugar baby. The sugar baby benefits, if you will. So, what perks and luxuries could you expect in the life of a sugar baby? Read on.
PRO #1. The Money
This one is a no-brainer. Whether you’re receiving sugar in the form of an allowance or Pay Per Meet, money is money.
And getting what amounts to a full-time paycheck on a regular basis – without anywhere near the time commitment of a full-time job – is one of the most wonderful perks of being a sugar baby.
The recommended allowance is basically everything you need for your monthly expenses (rent+bills+food+tuition) times two. That’s usually enough for most of us to put away a pretty penny or two every month.
Tons of free time, the option of not having to work, and a stash of cash to pay your rent, your bills, and take you where you want to go. Oh, that’s one of those sugar baby benefits that never gets old.
PRO #2. Luxuries
Here’s one of the biggest perks of being a sugar baby: you often get more than just the promised sugar. Sugar daddies can also pay to take you to:
- Posh restaurants that you normally couldn’t afford
- To exotic destinations that are out of your budget
- Some of the most expensive hotels and resorts in the world
- Theatre, opera, the ballet, you name it
Luxury gifts are also on the menu. Sugar babies have received everything from couture purses and Apple MacBook Pros to “here’s my card” shopping sprees. And that’s on top of the regular sugar they’re already receiving.
And of course, it’s not just over-the-top luxuries. There are the little luxuries that having a generous sugar daddy provides. Like being given one of his extra cars to use. Or always getting into the VIP. Or having whatever item you need delivered to your doorstep.
To be honest, it’s those little, day-to-day sugar baby benefits that really makes the sugar baby lifestyle sweet.
PRO #3. Free Time
Ah, free time. What a luxury. Sometimes an even greater luxury than just money. Having ample free time to do the things you love without having to work full-time for comfortable living – quite possibly the best thing ever.
A wonderful thing about all this free time, in our humble opinion, is the chance it also gives you to learn new skills and increase your value without having to pay for your existence by working a dead-end job.
Yes, you can leverage your free time to take resume-boosting courses, try out an internship that might lead to a career shift, and pick up a few hobbies that may turn into income over time.
In that way, a sugar baby lifestyle can translate into way, way more than just money and expensive baubles. You can use it as a stepping stone to your own success. And in that way, it can be a sugar baby benefit that lasts a lifetime.
PRO #4. Experiential Knowledge
This is one of those intangible benefits of having a sugar daddy, but not every sugar baby takes advantage of it. Whether you already are a sugar baby or planning to be, take advantage of this last benefit as it just might be the most useful thing you gain from the sugar relationship.
Any sugar daddy who’s able to afford thousands of dollars to take care of you every month has done something financially right. Learn from him. Question him. Find out how he does things and most importantly, how he thinks about things.
Don’t let him just catch you fish – let him teach you how to fish.
PRO #5. Connections
You know what they say: it’s not about what you know, but who you know. And successful sugar daddies tend to know a lot of people in the right places.
Which is not surprising. After all, powerful, smart, driven people tend to hang out with other like-minded individuals. In our experience, most sugar daddies are happy to offer wisdom and even a little networking boost to someone they view as their protégé: you.
This is absolutely one of the biggest benefits of having a sugar daddy. So take advantage of them. These connections can become very useful when it comes to getting your foot in the door.
PRO #6. Confidence Boost
Here’s one sugar baby benefit that just doesn’t get talked about enough: it’s a major confidence boost.
When you meet a successful man who is not only willing to pay for dinner, but pay for your lifestyle. Just for the pleasure of your company. Well, you feel pretty good.
Here’s how one sugar baby put it: “Someone spent more than twice my monthly rent just to meet me for a first date. I can feel my back straightening every time I think about that.”
But of course, being a sugar baby is not all Moët and Valentino. It’s got its warts as well.
6 Drawbacks of Being a Sugar Baby
The perks of being a sugar baby are pretty much the same for most sugar babes. On the other hand, the disadvantages range a lot. Some sugar babies hardly notice any disadvantages. Others can list a ton.
So what’s the difference?
The sugar daddy you choose and the relationship you both decide upon. This is by far the most important consideration in your life as a sugar baby and the difference between whether you will enjoy being a sugar baby or live to despise it.
Remember always that a mutually beneficial relationship is first and foremost a relationship. Choose wisely who you get into one with.
That being said, there are a few disadvantages to being a sugar baby that both happy and unhappy sugar babies can agree with…
CONS #1. The Secrets
The life of a sugar baby is oftentimes a secretive one. Sure, some sugar babes are perfectly okay telling their friends – and maybe even family – about this part of their lives but most choose to keep it private. And this can get complicated.
People close to you might wonder why you suddenly have so much free time. Or how you could afford expensive jewelry or gadgets or the rent on your city-center loft, especially without a job. Or who you’ve been going on those little trips with. Do you have a boyfriend? If so, how is it no one has met him? Why are you suddenly doing so well?
To keep the details of a secret sugar life a secret, many sugar babies end up often lying to those closest to them. At first, it might not seem like a huge deal but after awhile, the secrets can push a wedge between you and those close to you.
Make sure you’re ready to deal with this before you embark on life as a sugar baby.
CONS #2. No “Real” Boyfriend
The biggest disadvantage of being a sugar baby – even if you have a sugar daddy you genuinely like – is the lack of a real relationship.
In most cases – your sugar daddy is not also your boyfriend. You’re not going to take him home to meet your parents, there’s no real future (aka marriage and kids) to look forward to, and you are not entitled to be chosen over, say, an important dinner meeting.
At the same time, juggling a sugar daddy and a real boyfriend is too much for a lot of sugar babies. Chances are – you’re not going to have a “real” relationship while you’re a sugar baby. Be prepared for this sacrifice before you dive in.
CONS #3. Time Control
Sure, you have tons of free time as a sugar baby. But one thing you most likely won’t have control of is when you see your sugar daddy. Most sugar daddies have busy hectic schedules and they squeeze you in when they have a free moment.
Sometimes, you won’t be notified until the last minute, sometimes you might have to cancel other plans you had. A crucial part of the sugar baby is being flexible with your time.
So if you want absolute control of your time and set schedules, this might not be the best lifestyle for you.
However, most sugar daddies will take your own time constraints into consideration. If you have a set schedule that you must keep (i.e. work or classes), just let him know and he’ll accommodate your schedule as you accommodate his.
CONS #4. Begrudging Company
This disadvantage is not a real disadvantage since it can be entirely avoided by choosing your sugar daddy wisely.
So many sugar babies fall into the trap of getting into an arrangement with the first sugar daddy who offers them a generous allowance. And then they face the misery of having to see this person over and over again while despising the time spent with him.
This is the worst sugar mistake you can make and we absolutely, under-no-condition, think anyone should do this. If you need money desperately, get a job first and then search for a sugar daddy with a clear sense of judgment.
There are tons of sugar daddies out there. Some you won’t like, other you’ll have a great time with. Hold out for the latter.
CONS #5. What’s Love Got to Do With It?
Here’s one disadvantage of being a sugar baby that falls on the opposite side of the spectrum: what happens if you fall in love with your sugar daddy?
If you’ve been choosy – or just lucky – in your sugar daddy search and waited to find a sugar daddy who you find attractive, get on with, and does a great job taking of you – it’s not surprising that you might start catching feelings for him.
And yes, there are cases of sugar relationships turning into the real deal – marriage and all. But for the most part, sugar daddies are looking for a no-stress, low-commitment arrangement. So if you do fall head over heels with a sugar daddy, there’s a good chance that it’ll be a dead end road.
CONS #6. Wheat vs Chaff
The sugar search can be an arduous process. And it’s not because there aren’t good, legit sugar daddies out there. It’s because for every 1 great sugar daddy, there are probably 5 fake sugar daddies.
That means you’re probably going to encounter a couple not-so-great men. These can range from the fairly harmless Splenda Daddy to the tricky, time-wasting Salt Daddy.
They can also range from the eccentric sugar daddy who has a few innocent quirks to the emotionally abusive nutjobs who will try to insult and demean you.
Yup, there are always bad apples, even in the sugar world. And unfortunately, this means that you’ll most likely encounter weirdos, egomaniacs, and flakes until you finally meet a legit sugar daddy.
To make it as a sugar daddy, you need to have a thick enough skin to be able to brush that emotional dirt off your shoulder and say: NEXT!
Are There Dangers of Being a Sugar Baby?
Asking if there are dangers of being a sugar baby is kind of like asking if there are dangers of dating. Because well, simply dating brings with it a certain level of risk. Especially if you’re a woman.
So overall, the dangers of being a sugar baby are very similar to the dangers facing women who do online dating. For the most part, they can be prevented by practicing the same safety precautions, like:
- Protect your personal information
- Always meet in public places
- Don’t share your private information, like bank logins
- If you’ll be sexually active, use protection
- If someone is harassing you or being rude online, block and report
In general, most bad sugar daddy misbehavior is similar to what you’d expect from the general population when on any kind of dating app.
But are there any unique dangers of being a sugar baby? Yes, we’d say there are two in particular that every aspiring sugar baby should keep in mind:
Sugar Daddy Scams. They target sugar babies because they know that it is those that are most desperate for money who are least able to think straight. Keep yourself educated so you don’t fall for these.
Predatory Sugar Daddies. Emotional, physical, and financial abuse can occur in any relationship. But if you’re a sugar baby without good boundaries, you can place yourself in a vulnerable position that makes it easy for a predatory sugar daddy to gain control over you and your autonomy.
This is why we always recommend that sugar babies have strong boundaries and always, always have a form of support.
So Should I Become a Sugar Baby?
You’ve read through the pros of a sugar baby lifestyle with excited anticipation but the cons are making you re-think the life of a sugar baby.
It’s time to be really, very honest with yourself.
While the upsides of a sugar baby lifestyle are amazing, you do also need to be able to handle the downsides. Can you? Let us know in the comments.
Editor’s note: This article has been updated and re-vamped in May 2023.