One of the hardest parts of sugar dating are the introductory conversations. What do you say? How do you phrase it? How best do you show him you’re interested? I’ve stared at many a blank message box, wondering how best to communicate my interest in a potential sugar daddy without sounding bland or fake.
Like anything in life, communication in the sugar dating world is about striking a hard and delicate balance.
Relationships – yes, that includes sugar relationships – require effort, interest, time and investment, in many senses of the word. After hundreds of messages and conversations with potentials, actual sugar daddies, and just friends, I’d like to say that I’ve mastered the art of sugar dating conversation, but it’s rarely ever that simple.
I did however, pick up a few tips, ideas and conversation starters that could help you connect with that daddy you’ve got an eye on.
Be Interested
If you’re not interested, it probably won’t work out well, and the only way to know whether or not you are, is to ensure you read their profile. It may seem like a lot especially if you’re going through tens and even hundreds of profiles, but it may be the wedge in the door to starting a great conversation.
In your potential’s profile you can learn a lot about them as a person and even what they’re looking for. That can help you bypass a lot of the 5 W questions and get the conversation moving smoothly.
Their age, location, and general information about their life and expectations can often be found on their profile. If your potential daddy is scant on the profile info, don’t be discouraged, that’s still something to go on, a little mystery is always fun.
Try opening a conversation around that. Tell them you’re intrigued or curious, mention why and ask if they’d be open to talking further. However, you choose to phrase that is up to you and how you’re most comfortable expressing yourself.
Also remember that conversation is a two-way street, as much as asking your potential questions shows interest, it turns into an interrogation if you don’t volunteer information about yourself as well. This isn’t only a great way to connect, it also makes the conversation progress easier and faster at times.
Getting Back to the Basics
It may seem pointless to some veteran babies to mention this, but if you’re new to the sugar dating world then this is for you: talk logistics. Once you’ve gotten to know a little more about your daddy, and they, you, it’s all about seeing if you could actually make a relationship work.
Here is where the art of conversation comes in: you want to cover the important topics without sounding stiff or professional. Things like location and age are crucial details that will likely come out during introductions or can be found on their profile but are definitely important to gauging whether or not a relationship is possible.
Another important detail to talk over is relationship status. Not every daddy is single, and not every daddy is looking for serious commitment. Understand your personal comfort zone and limits and let your daddy know what you can and can’t work with.
Discuss Expectations
By far the most complicated aspect of the getting-to-know-you process. What are your expectations? It might help to make a list for yourself, then decide what items on that list are must-haves and which ones are conditional. That can help you structure your expectations and communicate them properly to your potential daddies.
Your sugar daddy’s expectations also matter. It is important to make sure that your expectations align early on so you know whether or not you can have a fulfilling relationship. If your daddy is heavily into sexual interaction and you’re not that may become a problem.
Voicing your opinion now will save you time and stress later on. Compromise is also a word that is not lost on many sugar daddies.
After getting to know you, some sugar daddies aren’t so firm on certain things, they’re more interested in having a relationship with you as a person and that’s where compromise comes in. You should also be ready to do the same for them.
Discussing expectations can be a sticky situation, but simple questions like “what brings you here” or asking about past sugar relationships can help you gauge what your daddy is in to and what they want.
The first question can help with opening a conversation, but the latter can help you form more targeted questions to ask your potential sugar daddy.
Discussing expectations also includes the financial and frequency side of things. What do you personally want or need financially to reach your goals? Is it possible for him to provide that? How often, when, an where can you meet? These are all seemingly minute details that need to be ironed out before you decide on anything.
There are of course, tons of other tips, tricks, ideas and conversations starters out there, these are only to get your creative juices flowing. Conversation in a new and foreign terrain can be daunting at times, but don’t let your learning curve discourage you from trying.
Stay engaged, put in effort, and you’re sure to reap the benefits. You may not always connect with your potential sugar daddy, at times it’s simply a question of logistics – discomfort with age, too much distance etc.
Nothing is ever really lost with sugar dating, each conversation, regardless of where it leads is a learning experience that will help you become more comfortable with the idea of asking questions and answering them.
More important than that, is feeling informed. Information is not only power but comfort. Getting familiar with potential daddies gives you the ability to make more informed decisions and makes it easier to relax around them.