Most new sugar babies rush into the game head on. After all, it’s not like we have many sugar baby mentors in our lives. And it’s not like we’re going to go to our closest friends and family for tips and advice.
So we poke around the Internet for sugar baby tips and stories and then jump in, completely oblivious to what the sugar world holds in store for us. As such, most of us learn about sugar dating the hard way – by living through it.
And that’s all fine and dandy but it’s also time-consuming and you unnecessarily put yourself through some crappy times. So do yourself favor and give this article a quick read – it’s hard earned experience that’ll take you less than 10 minutes to learn.
Here are the 7 things every new sugar baby should know!
Of course, self knowledge is not something you can make yourself learn right before you sign up to a sugar daddy site – it’s a life long process. So what we mean by this is to simply know what works for you.
As in, what sort of sort of personality types do you get on with? What sorts of personalities can you not stand? Sugar dating is very much like real life dating in that people who get on tend to have much more successful arrangements so the first step is to know who your ideal person is and then go look for him.
We hate to break it to you, but sometime during your sugar journey, you’re going to meet at least one douchebag. He’ll show up when you’re least expecting it and treat you like crap, make assumptions about you that you don’t appreciate, and will generally reveal himself to be the world’s largest asswipe.
We wish these people would just crawl under a rock and die but they insist on living so what can you do?
The best thing? Ignore them – or give them a piece of your mind, if you must – block them and then do your very best to forget about them and not let them taint your thoughts. That’s the most important thing: get them out of your system as soon as possible and don’t let them poison you.
Because dealing with one jerk is one thing but dealing with one jerk and then assuming all sugar daddies are jerks is just shooting yourself in the foot. It’s like going to Rome, meeting one asshole and then declaring that everyone in Italy is a giant jerk. Ridiculous, right? So don’t do it with the sugar world.
Sex. Money. Good times. All these are easy. What doesn’t come cheap is trust. If you can establish trust with a potential sugar daddy, you’ll be differentiating yourself from 99% of the sugar babies out there.
The Internet is a joint that people flock to yet view with a certain amount of distrust and this is magnified when it comes to the sugar dating scene. There are shady, scammy people on these sites and trust us when we say that every bona fide sugar daddy is acutely aware of what it could cost them.
So if you can be trustworthy, discreet and a generally nice, person – it’ll make you stand out among the crowd.
Not just money, mind you – we mean talking about money. You can’t be stammering and stuttering and avoiding the topic of what you want, after all. In short: don’t be afraid of talking about what you know and he knows you’re on the website for.
Of course, there are classier ways of going about this than “b*tch betta have my money!”
But yes, finances are important. That’s why you’re there. Embrace it, get comfortable with it and learn how to get what you want. Because if you can’t talk about it, some POTs will gladly skirt around the topic as well. And that’s not what you want, is it?
Here are some helpful articles to get you comfortable talking money:
This is so important that we’re going to repeat it again: never, ever have sex on the first date. There are no exceptions to this rule. Under no circumstances will you give him a “taste” and no, he cannot “test drive” you. You are not a car, you are not an escort and if he insists, you need to say good-bye and leave.
Because if he’s pushing for sex on the first date, the chances are mighty high that he has no intention of entering into an arrangement with you.
Sure, some maybe genuine sugar daddies will test you to see if you’ll have sex with them on the first date but most real sugar daddies will not. The majority of men who do this are guys who find their way onto sugar daddy sites posing to be real sugar daddies in order to get laid when they have no intention of doing anything for you. Drop these fake sugar daddies fast.
By this, we don’t mean to be a harsh, cold-hearted b*tch. Don’t be that – it’s not good for you. What we do mean is to be ruthless with your time and protecting your emotions.
How well you do as a sugar baby depends on this. You’re not in this game to be endless strung along by fake sugar daddies who want your time for free. You’re not in this to play girlfriend to some guy who’s not giving you any benefits. You’re not in this to be emotionally abused or put down by some jerk who has unresolved issues with women.
So when you catch a whiff of fake sugar daddy syndrome from a POT you’ve been communicating with – drop him like a hot potato. This includes POTs who you’ve gone on several dates with and who still haven’t handed you a check. This includes POTs who say and do things to make you feel like crap. This includes POTs who keep calling and texting and treating you like you owe him your time even though you’re not in an arrangement. You owe him nothing and he needs to be dropped.
Because all the time you’re wasting on these fake sugar daddies is time that you could be spending looking for a real sugar daddy who’ll give you the arrangement you want.
What we wish for all new sugar babies is that you find yourselves in the perfect arrangement with as little hassle and drama as possible. Which brings us to the sweet spot, the goal, the holy grail of arrangements, which is: Date a sugar daddy who you genuinely like as a person and who has the funds to be your sugar daddy.
Let go of whatever transactional mindset the media has portrayed sugar dating to be and look for sugar daddies who you actually like spending time with and who care about you as a person.
Because being with someone just for money is tiring and crappy. Especially when there will be someone out there who offers more than that. Don’t settle and find your sweet spot.