One question we get asked a lot is whether a sugar baby should travel to meet a potential sugar daddy. Note the operative word here is “potential.” While traveling outside of your comfort zone always comes with a risk – it gets much riskier when you’re going to some unknown city to meet with someone you essentially don’t know.
This is not to say that traveling to meet a potential sugar daddy is dangerous – we’ve done it before a few times and they’ve all been safe and oftentimes really fun, experiences.
But we’ve also heard of one too many experiences from sugar babies who found themselves not taken care of, exploited and left at the mercy of douchebags posing as sugar daddies to recommend traveling without taking necessary precautions.
The trick to safely traveling to meet a potential sugar daddy is all about how you plan the trip beforehand. Here’s what we recommend you do before you grab your passport or suitcase…
First things first. You’re going to be traveling to a place where you probably don’t know anyone in order to meet your potential sugar daddy.
This is very convenient for him. It’s not so convenient for you – you have to spend your time (at the opportunity cost of meeting local sugar daddies as well as taking time off from your school or work) and you also have the inconvenience of not knowing your way around the city, not knowing anyone in that city, and having to pay for things you don’t have to pay for at home (i.e. hotel, toiletries, eating out, etc). Not to mention, traveling can be pretty exhausting – fun, but exhausting.
By agreeing to travel to see a potential SD, you’re doing him a favor. He knows this. Make sure you do too.
This means that he must be willing to do what he can to make sure the travel arrangements are suitable for you. And what constitutes suitable travel arrangements?
First and foremost – you’re staying at a hotel. Under no circumstances will you be “sleeping over” at his abode. We don’t care how many times he assures you you’ll have your own bedroom or how awesome his house is. You two are not yet in an arrangement – you are traveling so you can both interview each other. There is no good reason why you shouldn’t have a place of your own, a sanctuary that’s YOURS and yours alone to sleep in.
Don’t agree to travel to meet him if he cannot agree on this one basic point.
The first thing you’ll want to do is to figure out exactly what your travel expenses will be. We’re talking absolutely essential travel expenses here:
Add it all up and give him the final amount. This is what he needs to send you, by cash transfer or PayPal in order for you to even think about making your way over to him.
This is important for 2 reasons: First of all, it makes sure all of your basics are totally covered in case anything goes wrong. If you show up in his city and find that you hate each other, having been pre-paid the money to get you safely home will ensure you’re not stranded, broke and suddenly totally dependent on him.
And secondly, when a sugar daddy agrees to cover the essential travel expenses, it shows him to be a real potential sugar daddy who is worth traveling for. A sugar daddy who is genuinely interested in having a mutually beneficial arrangement with you will ensure that you’re comfortable and cared for.
Again, he knows that you coming to see him is a risk – a risk that he can significantly reduce by coughing up the necessary funds. If he cannot even do this, he is not sugar daddy material. Essential travel expenses will usually total less than $2,000 so if he is not willing to shell out even that amount for your sense of security – ixnay that dude.
Note: If he questions why he should send you this money when you could just run off with the cash, you need to remind him that trust goes both ways. You’re willing to trust him enough to spend your time and effort to travel to his turf so he needs to show that he trusts you enough to take that chance.
If he’s a real sugar daddy who’s interested in an arrangement, it’s a risk he’ll take, especially if you’ve been corresponding for awhile and he really wants to meet you. The first sugar daddy who wired me around $1K for my travel expenses joked that “in case you run off and I never get to see you, hope you spend it on something fun!” A few thousand dollars is a small risk to these sugar daddies – it’s a big risk for you – so a real sugar daddy will fork it over.
Once you’ve secured all of the above, it’s time for the final round: getting some details about your potential sugar daddy – more personal information than what’s written on his sugar daddy profile. The reason we save this for last is that many sugar daddies can be pretty reluctant to part with personal information (can you blame them?) – but if he’s already agreed to the above requests, he’ll be much more willing to agree to this one.
And this one is pretty simple: you’re just going to ask him for some assurance that he’s a real person, an upstanding citizen and member of society. You just want to make sure of who he is, you know, just in case. He should understand.
The easiest thing is to ask for the company he works for or owns – ask for a company website – or at least his full name so you can do a quick Google search on him. The key is to ask for some kind of identifiable information about him, something that lets him know that you know things about him. It evens out the risk you’re both taking.
Lastly, before you take off – let someone you trust know where you’re going and who you’ll be meeting. You can take it a step further by reaching out to other sugar babies who live where you’re going – sugar babies are everywhere 🙂 – by using the search feature on popular sugar dating websites to search for and message women you think you’ll get on with in the city you’re flying into.
Stay safe, sugar babies!