How to Be a First Time Sugar Baby: A Quick Starter Guide

By Caitlin


So you’ve decided to give sugar dating a try but you’re a little nervous because this is all brand new to you, have no fear! Don’t be nervous at all! That’s why there are sites and articles like these to help guide you through and let you know it’s less nerve wracking than you think it is.

I’ll be honest and say I was super scared, nervous and doubtful about putting myself out there because I was never someone with very much self esteem and starting my journey of being a sugar baby really helped me boost my own self love and made me realize that you will never know the result of something unless you try.

There are tons of online sites to make profiles and interact with potential sugar daddies, I go in depth in a previous article on what are some good sugar dating sites to meet potential SD’s and how to write a profile and send messages that stand out, so check that out as well!

It usually begins on the phone…

Now once you’ve sparked some interest in a potential SD and have some back and forth message conversation going on, he may give his number out and move the conversation to text instead, this is good because this shows he wants to actually get to know you better.

In my previous experiences, the SDs have always asked for you to send a picture, there’s no harm in asking for him to send a picture as well just that it is fair game to confirm that they are who they say they are from their profile.

Don’t be afraid to be yourself through text as well! It’s hard to read context through text but keeping it fun and throwing in a few exclamation points and a smiley face will let that SD know how upbeat you are to be around and how excited you are to meet.

It sounds terrifying meeting someone most likely older than you, especially when this is your first time. Instincts always comes first, if there’s something off and you have a weird feeling about a particular SD, don’t meet him. I promise you that you will find another SD that will be just as interested in you.

The first sugar date…

Meeting for the first time can be intimidating, so setting up the first date at a public space like a restaurant or coffee shop would be great. I actually met up with my first SD by a beach and we walked along the pier and boardwalk! It was a great place to talk and get to know each other.

Here are several articles for the perfect first sugar date:

Getting into the nitty gritty…

As you’re on your first date, there’s going to be the elephant in room the whole time. Allowance. It’s on your mind and it’s on his mind. If you two have not already spoke about it through messages or text now is the time to bring it up.

You don’t want the arrangement to keep going further and not have a solid ground on what you bother are looking for.

Believe me it’s also intimidating being so straightforward asking for a fairly large sum of money for your needs. I got nervous every time in the beginning when this conversation had to be brought up.

For me, it’s been every time that the SD brings up the question but if they don’t, please don’t hesitate to ask them, “so what are you looking to get out of this arrangement” and then you let them know exactly what you are looking to get out of it, the allowance you want and it’s always fantastic to follow up and say what you will use the money for, i.e. school tuition, textbook, rent, etc.

After all it is the SD is investing in you and want to assure him that the money is put to good use and not on booze and the heels you’ve been eyeing for weeks.

It’s great to also discuss how often the allowance will be paid out – Monthly? Weekly? Every time you see each other? You may even want to discuss how you’ll be receiving your allowance – here are the most popular ways of getting a sugar baby allowance and their pros and cons.

Logistics also matter so discuss how often you would like to meet, both of you probably have busy schedules, so do weekends work better? Meet twice every week? Is he in out of town a lot and his schedule changes?

Figure out how much he would like to talk via phone when you’re not together, does he want a text every few days just to know you’re thinking of him or does he want a text or phone call on a daily basis to keep up to date? This SD could be a very busy person and not want to be bothered at work by day, figuring how much communication is needed is key.

The most important thing…

So now that you have an arrangement starting to flourish, you’ve gotten to know each other’s hobbies, what the arrangement ensues, there are a few things to keep in mind. Ask yourself do you feel comfortable with this SD? Do you feel comfortable being in public with him? Are you happy when you spend time together or talk to him over text/phone? Is there chemistry?

All of these questions have to be a yes, or else your time will feel like a chore and it shouldn’t have to be that way. I cannot stress how important it is that there has to be chemistry. If there is no chemistry you’re forcing yourself to pretend like you enjoy each other’s company and there is nothing more tiring than faking your feelings.

You should be excited every time you two go on a date, not be dreading it.

These are all just main tips that I think first time sugar babies should keep in mind. There are so many more in depth tips that are crossing my mind but I don’t intend to write a novel on here! If there are any questions I would love to hear you guys leave a comment at the bottom of the article and I would be happy to answer your questions!

This post is brought to you by one of our contributing SB writers, Noelle, aka The Different One. You can check out her sugar baby story here!

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(3) comments

Jayn October 23, 2017

I’m just starting out as a sugar baby and I live alone with my only friends in a reachable distance are my friends at church. I’m really terrified at how things will pan out should I feel like there’s a sugar daddy I want to try to meet. If my safety would be at stake to meet a strange man whom I hardly know the face of even if it’s in a public setting.

I want to bring a friend along, but unfortunately, the friend who would understand me is stuck in a different state and the friends that can reach would be absolutely mortified by the mere idea of sugar dating. Are there anyways to make sure I’ll be safe on the first date? Obviously there’s a large chance of being catfished. I just want to know if there are any safety measures I can prepare.

I’ll definitely try googling their images (please recommend if there are any sites/apps you think work best for the purpose) but other than common sense by picking them out through conversations, there’s not much to do. Private investigators are too expensive for my salary to contribute to, so now I don’t really know what else to do.

Mary March 31, 2018

Ok how about you ever had sex for the first time and you want to be a auger baby

Mary March 31, 2018

Ok how about you ever had sex for the first time and you want to be a suger baby for the first time just wondering how does it all work

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